5 Ways to Use a Defining Moment to Fuel Your Career—and Your Life
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Use the momentum of a significant event to make changes with impact
There are many examples of one event being a positive turning point in professional life. The key is recognizing the opportunity—and seizing its power.
Some defining moments are life-altering, causing irreversible change. Others can usher in less-dramatic but still meaningful transformations. Both provide the chance to learn and grow, professionally and personally.
The power of the Peak
Why do we remember certain moments more than others, and how can we use those “selective memories” to implement necessary changes?
Consider what psychologists call the “Peak-End Rule.” People tend to rate their experiences based on two key moments: the best or worst point (the “peak”), and the end. Other details tend to fade from memory. But the impressions of that crest can propel meaningful change.
When the peak moment is truly awful, change is often forced upon us. Consider the case of a firing or demotion, or the failure of a business. In the wake of a devastating loss, many people reevaluate their entire lives and find a new way to live.
But positive peaks—even those that seem unremarkable at the time—can inspire reassessment and action as well. A "side hustle's" unexpected success could cause an uninspired practitioner of one trade to take up a new vocation. High praise and visibility for a job well done might launch a previously unrecognized talent into an elevated role. A pivotal meeting with a business contact may lead to starting a new business.
Here are five ways to recognize peak moments as an opportunity and act on them:
1. Revisit your vision for the future
A defining moment inherently causes a reevaluation of the status quo. It imposes a sense of urgency to act. A recurring theme in the biographies of famously successful people is the ability to mine their lives' seminal experiences for the qualities that make them excel.
When a negative or positive peak occurs, take the time to self-assess. It’s critical to understand the circumstances that led to the moment to forge a path forward that is consistent with your goals.
2. Clarify your purpose
You may find yourself at a mental crossroads immediately following a defining moment. Use the experience to find inspiration and identify what matters to you. You may find that the goals you’d been chasing are not the ones you have passion for or will bring you joy and satisfaction.
You might also discover, particularly in the case of loss, that you had been working to fulfill someone else’s plan for you, not your own. Rebuilding will require introspection and honesty.
3. Articulate your goals
Being able to identify what you need and want is a good start. Next, be precise about what you want to accomplish and how that can happen. Chart goals for the immediate and longer-term future. Think about your commitments and how you propose to meet them.
Apply the lessons of this pivotal moment while constructing a strategy for achieving these objectives.
4. Break from the past—gently
Lasting change is most often the result of carefully planned baby steps in the right direction. In the aftermath of a pivotal life experience, it’s best not to disrupt everything at once. Some stability is required to make sure your next steps are sure-footed.
Defining moments are often described as “character-building.” This critical point in a professional or personal life will test your mettle and uncover strengths and weaknesses. It is essential to pay attention to what either success or failure (or whatever lies between) reveals about yourself, and make the necessary corrections, carefully.
5. Build relationships
A defining moment can have the power to change a relationship forever. Positively or negatively, how you react to joys and crises affects others. You owe it to the people in your life to navigate these turning points with care and responsibility.
Professionally, anyone in a leadership position can create peak moments for others and even elevate the fortunes of an entire company. You can share your learnings by mentoring others and guiding them through their own pivotal events.
Make the moment matter
A defining moment presents the chance to lift ourselves out of the ordinary, the rote, and the stale. It is the opportunity to elevate ourselves, perhaps incrementally but meaningfully. If we recognize and leverage it, a peak moment can be a catalyst for lasting, positive change.
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