How to Make Thinking Positively—or Any Good Habit—Something That Sticks

If you are stuck in an unproductive rut, train yourself to adopt new mental habits. Here are some tricks to making them last.

William James, echoing Aristotle, wrote, “All our life, so far as it has definite form, is but a mass of habits.” Our actions and thoughts reflect ingrained patterns of instinctive and learned behavior, for better or worse.

We are what we repeatedly do, according to both philosophy and behavioral science. And understanding that will allow you to use it to your advantage.

Start by deconstructing the negative

The easiest way to build a new, beneficial habit is to replace an existing bad one. Behavioral science is unequivocal on this point: it is easier to stop doing something if you replace it with another (perhaps not as satisfying but healthier) something. But before you can swap out the old habit, consider why it became a habit in the first place.

For example, the past year of limited activity and home confinement may have turned occasionally eating junk food into a daily occurrence. And if unhealthy eating has gotten out of control and interferes with your health, think about why. Is something specific triggering binges? Maybe it’s because you’re sick of cooking healthy food. Or perhaps it’s a result of boredom fueled by lockdowns and an abundance of screen time.

Habits follow a very predictable loop of trigger-behavior-reward. Being honest with yourself about your triggers gives you the power to eliminate them, or at least find new ways to manage them. Being self-aware about your behavior patterns is the first step toward changing them.

Replace the bad with the good

Once you have identified triggers, the next step is figuring out how to replace negative behavior with a more positive action—based on what would be a compelling incentive or reward.

Perhaps instead of unhealthy snacks, you can try stocking up on healthy foods. You could schedule a new activity for the times you are most tempted to binge. Your reward might be as simple as taking a walk or doing yoga.

Food is just an example. For any bad habit, it’s important to replace it and reward yourself with something you enjoy — or can learn to enjoy — and that you will do regularly for some time, so it sticks.

Thoughts are as habitual as actions

It is just as easy, if not easier, to develop a habit of negative thinking as it is to cultivate a more tangible vice, such as eating junk food. Your brain can get accustomed to filtering stimuli through a negative lens. If you habitually think the worst has happened or will, those expectations can be self-fulfilling.

In the same way you’d replace a snack with a walk, replace a negative outlook with a change in perspective. You can break a cycle of negative thinking by setting a realistic goal for yourself, personally or professionally. 

Positive people tend to spend more time thinking about what they can achieve than dwelling on their past missteps. The happiest people, according to psychologists, don't get stuck on the "if only."

And accomplishing even a minor change in attitude can help rebuild self-esteem and lead to more constructive thought patterns about other aspects of life.

Work on developing mental strength

Just as regular exercise makes our bodies stronger, a practiced routine can increase mental strength. Many of the people we regard as mentally strong, either because of what they have achieved or endured, credit positive habits for their resilience.

While everyone’s success formula is unique, some common threads emerge: an unwavering belief in their abilities, the capacity to ignore the haters, and prioritizing positive over negative thoughts.

Reach out to your network

Enlisting the support of other people is one of the best ways to make a healthy habit stick. The right relationships can help you achieve sustainable, healthy change. The effectiveness of this strategy has been backed up by numerous sources—both anecdotal and scientific.

Positive habits are more likely to become ingrained if reinforced by human-to-human connection and a personal network of encouragement. Measurable, lasting results can often be attributed to the motivation offered by an extended community and personal contact with people who model the behaviors to which you aspire.

Some self-awareness and group support can help you put the right types of habits in place to change the direction of your life.

Reach out. Swap out bad habits for good ones. And reward yourself for progress. You’ll develop better habits and a more positive mindset quickly.

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